Sister Theresa Clare Carr

Sister Theresa Clare Carr passed away the morning of Monday, May 5, at Saint Mary-of-the-Woods, Indiana. She was 93-years-old and had been a Sister of Providence for 75 years.

Commentary

Written by Sister Denise Wilkinson, SP

Disclaimer: As I was writing this commentary, I felt great empathy for the concluding words of the Gospel of St. John. “There are many other things that Jesus did. If they were all written down one by one, I suppose the whole world could not contain them.” If all I heard and read these past days were written down one by one – the whole world could not contain them.

But here we go …

When asked to write this commentary, a song from the musical film “The King and I” immediately came to mind. Anna, an English woman, traveled to Siam to teach English to the Siamese king’s children. As she gets settled and begins to appreciate the new culture surrounding her, she sings the lovely song “Getting to Know You” to the many children in her care.

In particular, these two verses reminded and remind me of our Sister Theresa Clare:

It is a very ancient saying,

But a true and honest thought

That if you become a teacher

By your pupils you’ll be taught.

No doubt, over her 65 years of teaching in elementary schools in Chicago; Van Nuys, California and Indiana, Theresa Clare must have learned about life from countless students and these same countless students learned about life from her.

Students definitely learned from her. Several of her friends spoke of Theresa as an excellent teacher.

These traits were most often given as examples of how she excelled. “She was an excellent teacher because she took everything in stride while being very firm with students. She was a stickler for correct English grammar. She drilled and drilled her students in the fine points of grammar. When her students went on to high school, a teacher at one high school said Theresa’s students ‘were the best grammarians she had ever taught.’”

What might have been the gifts her students gave to Theresa? Perhaps these traits so often mentioned to describe Theresa Clare: The gift she had of really listening to others; her very real spirituality – she saw God in everyone and everything: She enjoyed life and having fun and laughing.

It goes without saying that Theresa Clare’s first learning originated in her family – her family she loved and still loves dearly and who loved and still loves her.

Clare Carr was born in Indianapolis on December 20, 1931, to John and Bridget McCahill Carr. Both of her parents were from Ireland. Clare was one of 12 children – six brothers and five sisters. Brothers Ed, Bud and Michael and her sister Catherine are with us today.

Preceding her in death are her brothers John, Francis, James; and her sisters Mary, Theresa, Jo and Susan.

Clare knew the Sisters of Providence from her grade school days as she attended St. Patrick, St. Catherine and Holy Cross in Indianapolis. She then attended Providence Aspirancy at St. Mary-of-the-Woods for high school.

When she entered the Congregation on January 8, 1950, she was given the name Sister Theresa Clare. She professed first vows in 1952 and perpetual vows in 1957.

Her Bachelor of Science in Education from Saint Mary-of-the-Woods College and Master’s of Science in Education from Indiana University gave her a firm foundation on which to build a fulfilling and probably exhausting teaching career. Indeed, Theresa Clare, alike Anna in “The King and I” became an expert in the subject she loved most – getting to know her students, their families and her co-workers.

The song “Getting to Know You” put me in mind of Theresa Clare, but these words from the Gospel of Matthew are truer than true of Theresa Clare. These words describe the heart and soul of Theresa Clare, the authenticity of her following of Jesus.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and find life burdensome, and I will refresh you. Take my yoke upon your shoulders and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble of heart. Your souls will find rest, for my yoke is easy and my burden light.”

Could there be a more perfect description of Theresa Clare – who took Jesus up on his invitation to take up his yoke and learn from him?

When I asked people to tell me about their relationship with Theresa Clare, these words were repeated and repeated: Humble – seriously, seriously humble; patient with people; gracious; unassuming; generous; willing to learn; a person of integrity; friendly; easy to be with; faithful; upright; generous; a true community woman; accepting the many challenges life handed her like loss of family members and dear friends; losing her eyesight; growing more and more frail.

This description of Theresa kept popping up: Theresa was a real person. I believe that means that Theresa had the gift of lightening our burdens. Her humility, her gentleness of heart made our burdens lighter.

Theresa found refreshment in her relationship with the God of Providence, with her family and with her Sisters of Providence. And her gentle and humble heart refreshed us. Not in flashy ways but in simple ways.

Theresa Clare reminded one sister of St. Therese of Liseux. The sister wrote, “Nothing was too minute for her to be of assistance for any occasion.” Theresa Clare embraced “the little way.”

Who could not smile and feel good watching Teresa Costello and Theresa Clare, propelled by their rollators, walking every inch of this campus – even out to St. Joe’s Lake and the college’s athletic fields? So well-known were they that the college students called them “The Walking Sisters.”

Lest we think that being “gentle and humble of heart” translates to being so sweet as to be boring or worse unbearable, let me tell you other things I learned about Theresa Clare.

One of our staff persons observed, “Theresa Clare was strong and very determined. What she wanted she wanted.”

Her brother Mike told me that she taught their nephew Frank. Frank and his classmates called her “Terrible Clare.” Another former student walked about her firmness with the class – a “kind of iron fist in a velvet glove” approach.

One of the nurses exclaimed “I loved Sister Theresa Clare. She was so humble and had a very quiet sense of humor that always took me by surprise.”

Theresa Clare enjoyed traveling. As Mike said, “she got around.”

She had a very, very good friend, Sister Dorothy Wolsiffer, and they did a lot of “getting around” in each other’s company. Their international travels included Germany and Ireland.

Traveling in the U.S. included a trip to Montana to visit Sister Richard Bussing. They also visited New York.

They found their way to Florida to baby sit Sisters Ann Paula Margaret Louise’s cat. An aside: The cat had the misfortune of curling up near Theresa Clare’s head. She was sound asleep until she felt something near her. She swatted at whatever it was and, as Dorothy described it, she flung the cat across the room. Every summer these two friends traveled somewhere.

One comment from Dorothy about their friendship amused me: “We were such good friends. She was very gentle and, you know, I’m not. But it worked. We were lifelong friends.”

In closing, Theresa’s brother Mike told me this lovely story. He and his wife Karen called Theresa Clare every Sunday. For years, they concluded their conversations in this way:

Mike: Clare, you know what you have to do?

Theresa Clare: What?

Mike: Say your prayers.

Theresa Clare: I do that already.

Perhaps the Sisters of Providence version of this touching tradition could be this:

Sisters of Providence: Theresa Clare, you know what you have to do?

Theresa Clare: What?

Sisters of Providence: Continue to watch over us, your Sisters, your family and all we love and minister with. Find ways for us to continue to feel your gentle and firm and loving self with us. When we need it, maybe you could give us a gentle swat – just to get our attention not to fling across a room.

Funeral Information

Funeral services for Sister Theresa Clare took place Wednesday, May 7, and Thursday, May 8, in the Church of the Immaculate Conception at Saint Mary-of-the-Woods.

A Wake took place from 2:30-4:30 p.m., Wednesday, May 7. Mass of Christian Burial was at 11 a.m., Thursday, May 8.

Memorial contributions may be made in honor of Sister Theresa Clare to the Sisters of Providence of Saint Mary-of-the-Woods.

We welcome you to share your memories of Sister Theresa Clare in the comment section below.

Sister Theresa Clare Carr

Complete Ministry

In Indiana: Teacher, St. John the Baptist, Fort Wayne (1953); Teacher, St. Mary, Lafayette (1953-57); Teacher, Holy Family, Jasper (1962-63); Teacher, St. Michael, Greenfield (1966-67); Teacher, St. Matthew, Indianapolis (1966-77); Teacher, Nativity, Indianapolis (1977-2002); Substitute Teacher/CCD Teacher, Southside Catholic Schools/Nativity Parish, Indianapolis (2002-16); Substitute Teacher, Southside Catholic Schools, Indianapolis (2016-17); Volunteer, Helping Hands, Providence Food Pantry, West Terre Haute (2017-20); Volunteer, Administration Building, Providence Hall, Saint Mary-of-the-Woods (2017-20), Prayer, Saint Mary-of-the-Woods (2020-25).

In Illinois: Teacher, Our Lady of Mercy, Chicago (1957-62).

In California: Teacher, St. Elisabeth, Van Nuys (1963-66).