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Habit forming dialogue

“Ok, let’s get in groups,” our facilitator announced.

The thirty of us adjusted into clusters, one for each generation present: millenials, gen-x’ers, Baby Boomers, the Korean War generation, and a smattering of wisdom figures from the World War II generation. Then the conversation began.

As canonical novices, Sister Anna and I have been meeting with this intercultural and inter-generational group of 20 men and women in formation and their directors in St. Louis almost weekly. We know this program as our Inter-Community Novitiate, or ICN. Each week at ICN brings a different topic, a different speaker, and deepening conversations as we get to know one another. This week’s topic was on the culture of religious life – both the culture we each bring with us and the culture of the community we are joining. Considering that about half of the novices grew up outside the U.S., you can imagine we’d have lots to talk about!

Blog post author Sister Tracey Horan, bottom row second to left, with her Inter-Community Novitiate group

Blog post author Sister Tracey Horan, bottom row second from left, with her Inter-Community Novitiate group.

Once in groups, we were asked to discuss the way our generation relates to a variety of topics – technology, clothing, communication, and social issues, to name a few. Before long, our group took up the topic of clothing. The discussion led some novices from eastern traditions to question why some of our communities chose not to wear a traditional habit. After all, from their perspective a habit allows for greater simplicity, saves money and closet space and levels the playing field for a community, as far as dress is concerned.

At this point, I should mention that the “habit” question is one that has elicited emotional responses for me in the past. I know many sisters who do amazing work in communities and feel that wearing modern dress has opened doors to relationships that might otherwise not have been forged. I have witnessed sisters passing on clothing to one another, either personally or through creative systems like our very own “free rack.” I have heard some of these same sisters talk about how they have been dismissed or looked down on by people who didn’t consider them “real” vowed religious, simply because of their external appearance. For me, this is a personal issue.

But, with a spirit of honesty, a desire for understanding, and a quick invocation of the spirit, I responded. I explained that after Vatican II our sisters decided, like many communities, that the traditional habit no longer fit its original purpose – to emulate working class poor of the day. We live the vow of simplicity in a variety of creative ways that, for the most part, do not include a uniform habit but do involve spending very little on clothing.

What followed was not the defensive response I expected, especially considering that the group included several sisters in habits and several brothers accustomed to wearing habits in their home countries. Instead I experienced a gift of this generation – a propensity toward openness, a desire to come to greater awareness about differences. One sister shared her gratitude for the diversity of women religious, and the way women with different passions and lifestyles can be attracted to a vowed life lived in different ways. Another shared her experience that habited sisters, too, can be tempted to accumulate different versions of and accessories for their dress. Even habited sisters are not immune to having stuffed closets, she said! We talked about the struggles and gifts that come with these differences, and how women in religious life often deal with the same increased emphasis on appearance that exists for women in broader society. As we sorted through our questions and experiences, I could feel my anxiety fading and my sense of connection with the group growing.

In light of recent acts of violence around the world and expressions of fear and intolerance in our own country, I find in this experience a small circle of light, a glimmer of hope. Among my peers, I found genuine concern, a desire for understanding, thoughtful questions, and an ability to embrace the gift of our diversity. I experienced in a small way the big potential that exists for men and women religious to model dialogue. I heard a sister in a habit say, “Your way of life is beautiful,” to me, a sister donning jeans and a pullover. What would happen if we expanded this small circle of light to bigger conversations? What if we could find space in our hurting world to say, “Your way of life is beautiful” to the Muslim family down the street, refugees across the world, a co-worker in the next office we often dismiss?

As I continue my formation as a Sister of Providence, I am grateful for the space to grow alongside other novices. I am aware of the sacred questions and conversations that shape who I am and who I am becoming. I am hopeful that this time will embolden my peers and me to love radically even when, as Mother Theodore said, “all appearances are against it.”

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Sister Tracey Horan

Sister Tracey Horan is a Sister of Providence in formation. She professed first vows in 2017. She is a former intern at White Violet Center for Eco-Justice, a ministry of the Sisters of Providence. She currently ministers as education coordinator at the Kino Border Initiative/Iniciativa Kino para la Frontera where she works with an education team to coordinate and host individuals and groups for immersions to the U.S./Mexico border in order to engage participants on the current reality of migration.

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9 Comments

  1. Cathy Campbell,SP on November 24, 2015 at 7:15 am

    Thanks for sharing Tracey. I could feel amazing energy from your reflections. Dialogue is a wonderful process that brings all of us to new places and spaces in our own thinking and in our relationships. I affirm and share your desire that more folks may find paths to dialogue when differences arise. We will all become much richer if we do.

  2. Carol Nolan on November 24, 2015 at 11:57 am

    Tracy, this is so rich and valuable! I’m printing it so I can read it slowly. I am struck by the openness of these young religious, and I can think of parallel experiences in our own community of acceptance and non. It’s probably part of the human condition; we can all grow. Thank you for sharing your experiences.

  3. Paula Modaff, S.P. on November 24, 2015 at 4:36 pm

    Well done, as usual, Tracey. Thank you!

  4. Janice Smith, SP on November 27, 2015 at 10:51 am

    Tracey,
    Beautifully written and well reflected upon.
    Janice

  5. Mary Ryan on November 28, 2015 at 7:35 pm

    Tracey,
    Your responses to all these issues are well-thought out and so honest. Your whole reflection is beautiful and thought-provoking. I am proud to call you “my sister.” Thank you.

    Mary

  6. Jenny on December 3, 2015 at 12:33 pm

    Thanks, Tracey, really appreciate your reflection…well done!

  7. John F. Herbertz on December 7, 2015 at 5:48 pm

    Sissy Tracey,
    I have so much to learn about who you are!

    • John F. Herbertz on December 7, 2015 at 5:51 pm

      I did not get to finish . . . I pushed the wrong button as usual, and it was gone in a flash.
      Love, Uncle John in Duluth, MN

  8. Carole Kimes, SP on January 31, 2016 at 8:45 pm

    Tracey,
    Thank you for giving me pause to reflect on how I need to grow and become more open to diversity. So much easier said than done. Your reflection is a challenge and an inspiration.
    What hope you share with us all!
    Love,
    Carole

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